Depression
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Thread: Depression

  1. #1
    Official RnS Addict legendlives's Avatar
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    Depression

    I read a lot on line recently about depression and how we are all supposed to try and understand and help, listen etc etc.
    Now my heart really does go out to depressed people. I cannot imagine how it must be to wake up and spend the day feeling dejected, lonely, afraid and paranoid, but as the husband of a woman who has had depression for many years I think it's about time we had a shout-out for the carers.
    Those people who deal with the day-to-day schizophrenia, the mental and sometimes physical abuse, the contradictions, the accusations, the not knowing what you're coming home to, is it tears and pain or laughter and loving today?
    Honestly it's sometimes enough to drive you literally mad.
    Over the years I've been accused of having a gay relationship with one of my mates (I haven't), having incestuous affair with my daughter (I haven't), having affairs with her friends (I haven't) not caring, not loving, trying to poison her (been tempted, but no, I haven't).
    I have never had a friend she's liked because of some weird jealousy over the time I spend with friends (which is only in working hours BTW).

    I know I'm not the only one who goes through this, so next time someone tells you their wife/husband/son/daughter/mum/dad or friend is depressed, ask how they are. I know it would mean the world.

    Just needed to vent. Thanks if you read this.

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    Supercharged 461 cu in prostreet70gto's Avatar
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    35 views already and not one person asks how you are?

    I think every now and then you have to reach out and that's what you have done here, from NZ to the uk I hear what you are saying and although im not in your shoes I am the carer for my last living parent which is testing to say the least and it doesn't matter how many people you have around you helping it is sometimes the loneliest place on earth.

    You spoke, I heard, breath it in, tomorrow is another day, but for today just do your best. Its not their fault or yours that they don't realise you are probably the only person who gives a **** when many others would have simply walked out the door. Now take a genuine look around you and think about all the people you know. How do you think they see you? Do they give you sympathy or ….look closer...do they look up to you for being that strong and coping with something they wouldn't be able to handle. Prob the second one right. Pat yourself on the back you ARE doing a good job even if you cant see any results. You are wanted more than you will ever know.

    Hopefully this message brings you some sunshine through the rain.

    Simon
    One word can say so much.....BLOWN

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    Rods 'n' Sods Junkie Austin Martin's Avatar
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    Your right of course, but I think I know how he feels "fkn worn out"

    My father suffered from depression although having a tough time during the war, and health issues it's no surprise, but still hard to deal with especially as a kid; I'm now the age he died at (57) and had a hard time coming to terms with that.


    Still on the bright side you've got us...…….
    Just a passer by as you might say.

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    Rods 'n' Sods Junkie rickbwigan's Avatar
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    you are definitely not alone, thats for sure. although not solely depression, my mrs has been suffering with severe anxiety and intrusive thoughts since the birth of our 2nd child. this lasted for a couple of years and she is just coming out the other side. obviously, it effected her massively, but it also effected me a lot. ive lost touch with friends as i have not been able to plan to meet them as i dont know what state she would be in each day. being late for work and not knowing how to explain why without making her sound like a lunatic.
    mental health issues are so hard to deal with and its way more common than people think or want to believe.

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    Administrator Darren West's Avatar
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    i can't pretend to know what its like to feel that way but if you ever just wanted someone to talk ******** with or anything else ill happily pm my number

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    Off the Xmas card list kapri's Avatar
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    Been both sides of this over many many years , you have my empathy .

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    Administrator blackpopracing's Avatar
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    I went out with a girl a few years back - she was a proper soul mate, but she also suffered with depression (did not realise it at the time) and it literally sucked the life from me, we broke up eventually as i nearly had a breakdown from the stress. It was only after we parted that I realised how much of me she had used up.

    Well done for hanging in there - it's exhausting.

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    Off the Xmas card list kapri's Avatar
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    We've been on courses to learn how to counsel when I used to do voluntary work .One of the first things they teach you is about 'distance' ,you can't offer a hand to help someone up from the gutter when you are sat down there with them.

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    Quote Originally Posted by legendlives View Post
    e. I cannot imagine how it must be to wake up and spend the day feeling dejected, lonely, afraid and paranoid, but as the husband of a woman who has had depression for many years I think it's about time we had a shout-out for the carers.
    Those people who deal with the day-to-day schizophrenia, t
    .

    doesnt everyones day go like that.i just presumed were all like that.but just deal with things in different ways
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    Official RnS Addict legendlives's Avatar
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    Thanks for the comments. It's good to know there is a place to vent without being criticized for being selfish....

    Quote Originally Posted by Darren West View Post
    i can't pretend to know what its like to feel that way but if you ever just wanted someone to talk ******** with or anything else ill happily pm my number
    Thanks for the offer Darren. Long distance and time differentials won't make this possible but sincere thanks for the offer.

    Quote Originally Posted by kapri View Post
    We've been on courses to learn how to counsel when I used to do voluntary work .One of the first things they teach you is about 'distance' ,you can't offer a hand to help someone up from the gutter when you are sat down there with them.
    Very difficult to distance yourself from someone you've shared your life with, and takes up so much of your time.

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